It’s Monday, (okay, so it’s Wednesday) and I know you’re busy. This feel-good wellness tip will only take a minute 🙂
ME not getting my Monday Minute to YOU on Monday is the perfect opportunity to discuss what happens when we fall short of our best intentions.
How do we handle the late assignment, going off our “diet,” missing a week at the gym, or just general back-sliding into our old sloppy habits now that the confetti from New Year’s is all cleaned up?
Certainly, a bit of drama can feel good. Beating ourselves up is a quick, go-to strategy we think will provide us with a much needed wake-up call.
I told you so!
Aren’t you ever going to get it together?
Maybe it’s time to just throw in the towel and admit that you are a(n) ___________!
I’ll let you fill in the blank.
There’s certainly energy in that approach.
But, have you ever noticed that calling in the “mean girl” rarely helps? In fact, it often leads to more of the same—-more procrastinating, more cheesecake, more days missed at the gym, and ultimately, a steeper climb out of the deep dark hole that swallowed you up.
People in my wellness workshops often seem surprised when I share the results of a Harvard University study about a possible reason why successful people are so successful.
In their study, published in the Harvard Business Review, researchers compared SELF-ESTEEM (I’ve got this one! I’m so awesome! Killed it!”), with SELF-COMPASSION (“So, you fell behind on the writing thing this week. What about looking back over your schedule and seeing what got in the way so you can make adjustments for the week ahead?”)
Self-compassion came out the winner, leading to “higher levels of personal well-being, optimism and happiness, and to less anxiety and depression.”
Given some thought, it makes perfect sense. Any big, hairy, audacious goal is going to have its ups and downs. Not to mention, there’s a lot about the journey that’s out of our control. (I know, I really hate that part too.)
Self-compassion seems like the perfect FEEL-GOOD back-up plan for falling off the wagon.
Whatever your goals are for the New Year, I’m going to suggest (based on what the smart people at Harvard say), that feeling happy and optimistic are better conditions to work under than feeling anxious and depressed.
To be clear, self-compassion is not about letting yourself off the hook—-that won’t EVER get you where you want to be. It’s simply about cutting yourself a bit of friendly slack along the way, like you would a good friend struggling with the same cheesecake addiction.
I’m just not sure it’s possible to win at wellness any other way.
My minute is up, and you have places to go and wellness to seek. I’m ALWAYS in with the whole self-compassion thing, are you?
Feel good. Be well. Meg
Who wants to share with me one specific area of your life where you can be kindler and gentler with yourself? It could be your way to commit to creating a strategy for success the next time around. For me, it was boldly sending out my Monday Minute on Wednesday!